College of St Ursula

College Motto: Sola Vera Schola (One True School)

The College of St Ursula is based at the University of Sydney in New South Wales, Australia in the Barony of Rowany. Local Collegians are referred to as Ursulans. Due to a mistake by a herald who accidentally read 11,000 instead of 11 Martyrs and Virgins whilst referring to the College in court, the College is now often referred to as ‘the College of St Ursula and Her Eleven Thousand Virgins and Martyrs’.

The College was established in August 1986 (AS 21), becoming the third College of Lochac, with Istvan Pannnonius as the first Seneschal. The College war cry is Ursula Invictus – a call for Ursulan victory.

St Ursula has various communication mediums, including their website, email list, and a facebook group.

The Ursulan mascots are a bear, reflecting the charges on their College arms, and the One True Carrot. The carrot mascot is derived from a series of events that occurred at a Rowany Festival many years ago, best told by Master Padraig Lowther:

Many moons ago, the Ursulans were off to Festival, and decided to car-pool. The food fund folk had pre-bought stuff like the meat, rice, bacon and eggs, and told each car to get 15 bucks worth of vegies. Each car took the same highway to site, and so passed the same discount fruit and veg stand with the sign that read “Carrots: 10c a kilo.” And so it came to pass that a camp of around a dozen people had 30-odd kilos of carrots to their name.

The rule was that no-one left camp unless they had a carrot with them. Need the privy at midnight? take a carrot to munch on the way. Off to war? Tape some to your helm. Bring someone home to your tent from the tavern? Not only do they get breakfast, but they get a carrot or ten to remember you by.

Carrots were strapped to shields, worn through belts as favours, used to barter with merchants, thrown at tourney participants who had not died well, planted in the armour of tourney participants who had died well so that the carrots could go strong in honour; ye gods, they even ate some of the carrots! Tangwystl, who was seneschal then, wore one through her belt the whole event. After copping some hits in war and tourney it was held together with duct-tape; thus it became known as the One True Carrot, by which all other carrots are measured and found to be wanting.

At the end of the event this carrot was embalming in a mix of liquor so foul and dodgy not even engineering students would drink it. This is still in the College Reliquary, and it was tradition to have the incoming do a shot of the embalming fluid so that they might see a spirit vision and Know the Will of the One True Carrot. As Kids Are Now Soft, I believe I am the last to have done this and know the Dark and Carroty Dreams wrought in its vegetative mind as it tumbles in its turgid tank of terrible tipple; it craves the irrigation of the carrot patches by the Blood of the Vile Hermanite.

The College device for St Ursula, as emblazoned on the Lochac Roll of Arms, is:

Argent, two she-bears combattant gules, maintaining between them two arrows inverted in saltire, in base an open book tergiant sable within a laurel wreath proper.

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St Ursula’s signature events include:

  • Martyr Auction – at each Rowany Festival, Ursulans auction themselves off as Martyrs to do two hours of work for the winning bidder to raise funds for the college.